May I Walk Proudly, Step Softly & Always Follow the Voice of My Heart

Thirty years. I have been on this earth for thirty years. I have had my ups and downs, successes and failures. Plans were made and fulfilled and broken. Things I wanted so badly to happen that didn't, and I wound up a much better person because of it. I have worked hard, stressed much, and made the most of what I have.

In the last thirty years, I have moved more times than I can count, been in school much longer than the average person, and met my soul mate (who I have known for 13 of my 30 years). I thought my parents were stupid and could never understand me, and then realized that they were the people in the world who cared the most about me. I thought my baby sister was a nuisance, and then realized that she was one of my best friends in the world. I have been blessed with a best friend who understands me and the (crazy) way I think, and who works hard to maintain a friendship with me, despite the fact that I moved away. I learned that I am much harder on myself than on anyone else, and sometimes that is not fair to me.

As time goes by, I have become more and more aware of the importance of my family, my friends, and myself. In turn, I am learning the value of experiences over things. I definitely have a lot to learn about myself, but I think I have put myself in a position to do just that. In the last year, I have had reminders of just how short life can be, and I hope I can make the most of all the time I have left. The last year has been full of difficult choices, and a big transition in my life, and I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I want in life. I have not figured it out by any means, but I want to focus on doing the right things for me and my husband moving forward.

David gave me a birthday card this morning that said: "may you walk proudly, step softly and always follow the voice of your heart."

I think that's a pretty good motto going forward. I have struggled with turning thirty, not because I feel old, but because I feel like I have some decisions to make during this decade. My hope for myself moving forward is that I will push myself to be the best I can be, while getting more comfortable in my own skin. I hope that I can do the things I want to do because I want to do them, and not because I care about pleasing someone else.

I want my thirties to be more authentic, and filled with more laughs with friends and family, more travel, and a better focus on what's really important to me. I am truly thankful for all I have, and I think things are just going to get better with time. Happy birthday to me...