Now It Is "Just Us"

We rescued Brennan, thinking we would like to have a pet and hoping to save him from the inevitable death that occurs when an animal lives in a shelter for a little too long. We thought we would do something kind for an animal, but we completely underestimated how he would transform our lives. We both had a special connection with him that cannot be explained. He was my baby. He was David’s best friend. He was a loyal and true companion. While he was alive these last few weeks, I wished for nothing more than his pain to end, especially after the horrible seizure on Sunday afternoon. Although I know deep inside that we did the right thing by letting him go, I now wish for nothing more than one more opportunity to pet him or feel his sweet kisses on my cheek. We are alone in a tiny apartment filled with reminders of him – his bed and toys in the living room, and his food bowls in the kitchen. I slept with his blanket last night because it was the closest thing to holding him that I could think of.

We have no children, no other pets. We have each other. That is enough. It was enough before Brennan, and it will (eventually) be enough after. He taught us how to love each other even more. That being said, it does not feel right for it to be “just us.” So much of our lives revolved around taking care of and loving Brennan. We do not know what to do with our time now that he is gone. Our days and nights will be filled with tears for a while. In those dark times when my mind flashes to his last few bad days, I try to remind myself of a precious memory that can never be taken away – the way he knew the names of all of his toys, his love of walks and rolling in the grass, his sweet kiss when he knew I was sad. I could go on for days about the joy that Brennan brought into both of our lives, but for right now, at least, that does not ease the pain. He was our friend, loyal and true, and we will miss him and love him forever.